Day 27 - Today I am grateful for...Dinner with Friends

I enjoyed dinner with four of my closest friends tonight, Vic & Nathan and Bradley & Megan.

Both couples are newly engaged and I'm honoured to have been asked to be bridesmaid for both of them!

I wanted to cook dinner for them as a little way of congratulating them in the only way I know how - a gathering.

There's something to be said for good times with good friends. No matter the time between visits or the distance, friends are friends and good friends pick up exactly where you left off.

So I cooked. Yes, you read that correctly. I cooked. Curried Sausages and Mash. Boring but yum!

We sat around and talked and laughed and enjoyed each other's company. The girls talked weddings and the boys talked camping.

We even got busy talking and arranging our next trip to Fraser Island in Easter 2011. It's going to be great!

As I looked at my friends though, happy and in love, talking about weddings and dresses, I couldn't help but reflect on my own marriage. There seemed a very obvious hole and I felt a little bit like the fifth wheel. I felt bad that the boys didn't have my male contribution to the friendship circle and not that they would ever have thought that or intentionally made me feel it, but I felt it. For the first time in a really long time, I missed my Husband.

It's not often that I think of him and even less that I miss him, but sometimes, in social situations, I miss him.

That's not to say that I don't enjoy entertaining any more but I realised tonight that I've turned into a bit of a recluse. What happened to me? When did I become so panicked about not being able to contribute to a social situation without a man by my side? How ridiculous.

Turn back the clock 2 years and there were always people at my house. I was forever cooking and entertaining and I loved it. I love having friends in my home and I always feel continually blessed having such wonderful people around me. My Ex-Husband and I were both very social people. If it wasn't dinner, it was a party. It was fun and they were good times that I look back on fondly.

I guess I realised tonight though, that I need to find a new niche in my life. I need to find a way to entertain my friends without feeling strange or lonely in my own heart or my home. I need to learn to be comfortable on my own and remember that my awesomeness is more than enough to pretend I'm two people for the moment, until Mr Right comes knocking on my door.

I'm grateful to my friends tonight for not letting me feel lonely. I'm grateful that they took time out of their days to come and spend time with me.

I choose to believe that they were here to enjoy my company and amazing cooking and not because they felt sorry for me. I choose to believe that one day there will be six at my table instead of five.....

I'm so very grateful to my lovely friends for keeping me company tonight. Love you guys xxx

Day 26 - Today I am grateful for....My Nail Tech, Amanda.

It was my fortnightly nail appointment today with my friend Amanda.

I'm not going lie, I'm a shocker with beauty.

Apart from the fact that I am no glamour and kind of see it as a waste of money when you have no palette or canvas to work with, really the only things I splurge on in life are my nails. I don't wear makeup, just mascara and lipstick. I've never dyed my hair in my life (once at the end of last year doesn't count in 30 years and it was so dreadful that I will never ever do it again), so I only ever go to the hairdresser once a year. I never have the money to go hardcore clothes or shoe shopping. So apart from my eyebrows, my nails are my vanity splurge!

It's kind of a double whammy for me. I used to get my nails done because I'm a biter. So my nails are not strong at all. So when I was doing keys at my work, I could never get the bloody keys off without breaking the small amount of nails that I did have or just failing at getting any keys off at all. Acrylic sorted all of my problems for me!!

Amanda has been doing my nails for years. At least 6 or 7 I think? And she's been doing my eyebrows for over 12! Mum and I stumbled across her one day at Fiona's in Clifford Gardens and have proceeded to follow her wherever she's gone since then.

She's a fabulous beautician and over the years we've become good friends. She did the makeup for my wedding, because I wasn't having anyone else do it. It was much to my disgust that I had to even wear makeup but I wasn't going to argue with my Mum about that....lol. So, if I had to wear makeup, I was having her do it, come Hell or high water!

I'm such a creature of habit and despise change so much that I even hate it when she goes away and I have to use those chinese ladies in Grand Central. Hate it. But I suppose I'll let her get away with a few camping trips a year with her family :-)

In truth, I look forward to my hour with my friend every 2 weeks. She has a lovely little family now and does some work from home. This is uber-convenient for me because I can go after work.

We laugh and chat and the time is over way too soon. And at the end of it my nails are acrylic strong and lovely again! Win!

So today, I'm grateful my lovely friend and amazing nail tech, Amanda. Mwah xxx

Day 25 - Today I am grateful for....Surprise Visitors

Today I am grateful for surprise visitors!

I enjoyed a random quick visit this afternoon, with some new friends that I made through my ex-man friend - His best friend Peter & lovely wife, Cynthia.

They popped in for a quick chat, clearly a bit sad that the wheels had fallen off our relationship.

As I have mentioned previously, I was not the one who he wanted to share the rest of his life with and I respect that. I'm not angry, just hurt. You can't make someone feel something that they don't, even if I was nowhere near clarifying that kind of commitment in my own head. Having been previously married also turned out to be a bug-bear for him, in terms of he felt like he would have always been my second choice. He also had previously told me that he felt that his friends had judged him for me being married. I could maybe understand that if I was the one who had broken my marriage, but I wasn't. And at the end of the day, being married is a part of my story and I'm not going to lie about it, if someone asks me. Cest le vie! But I was actually really thankful that they popped in, because it gave me a chance to let them know my side, for whatever worth it is. I was able to tell them how I felt and that I missed him. That's not to say it would ever make any difference, but it was certainly some closure for me and some reassurance that I'm not a horrible person.

And as vain as it sounds, it was nice to hear that they were sorry for me that things hadn't worked out. It was nice to hear that they thought he was mad for letting me go! lol. I appreciated the sentiment and it validated me. We talked and laughed and chatted for about half an hour.

I'm hardly home during the day, so to jag me here must be some kind of small miracle!

It's kind of one of those spur of the moment things, to pop in on someone. They are suddenly on your mind and you think, why not see if they're home for a cuppa?

To put things into perspective for you though.....I HATE surprises and always have. No surprise Birthday parties. No surprise gifts. No change in plans. No surprises of any kind. I don't cope particularly well. In fact, I think it's more of a change thing. It is well known that I don't cope well with change - AT ALL, and a surprise is a version of change. It's something I wasn't expecting and it completely throws me. I don't even cope well with getting lost! It's definately a control thing for me. I am completely out of my comfort zone and I hate it. I'm kind of getting better with age but it's still something I struggle with.

I'm hopeless though. As if my phobia affects everyone, I always have to ring first. To make sure it's OK. That I'm not intruding. That they're not in their pyjamas or worse...lol. But whilst I'm like that, I'm not at all peturbed if someone drops in on me to visit. It's odd. I don't do surprises but I don't mind surprise visits. I love it in fact....unless my house is a brothel. Then I'm madly rushing around trying to clean it!

But it's nice to know I'm in someone's thoughts, as so many people cross mine each day.

So today, I'm grateful for surprise visitors! What a treat :-)

Day 24 - Today I am grateful for....My Mum's Roast Dinners

OMG. I think I may die.

I've eaten waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much. My Mum cooked Roast Pork tonight and I'm pretty sure that I may explode.

But...it was amazing.

Words can't describe how good it was. Pork, crackle, veges, gravy, white sauce, apple sauce. Nom nom nom.

I can't actually remember the last time that I cooked? Microwaving things does not count as cooking. But frankly, cooking for one is a waste of time. So I don't. I'm quite surprised that my body hasn't shut down but it hasn't. And I'm thankful for that.

Lucky for me, my Mum is an amazing cook. Unlucky for my future life partner (when he arrives), I did not inherit this gene. OK, so that's not entirely true, but I'm not a fabulous cook. I can follow a recipe - I'm not special needs, but I'm by no means creative. I cook the same things over and over again, just because I can and I know that I can't fail. Yes, I'm lazy but I'm also not experimental, so I would prefer to serve something to people that I know works, is edible and ultimately tastes good.

Food has always been a central part of being in the Armstrong family. Good food. Good company. Never the two shall be parted. My Mother is always finding something new to experiment on my Dad & I with. 9 times out of 10, it's awesome. There are hundreds of cooking magazines and cookbooks in their home, and all of them have little post its stuck everywhere, when she finds something that works. Meanwhile, I don't have the time or patience for that. I'm a shocker.

But I love having dinner with my parents. It's just us and time for me to spend with my two favourite people in the world. We talk and laugh and joke and eat. I'm usually going through some kind of stupid crisis in my life and seeking some kind of clarity from them. I tell them my sagas and they chime in where necessary, in order to give me an ass kicking if I need it, or an ear pulling if I need that. They tell me about all the new things that are going on with them. It's special time.

So tonight, on a Saturday night, when most people my age are out partying, I'd rather spend it having dinner with my Mum and Dad.

And I'm uber-thankful for my Mum's amazing Roast Dinners. Thanks Mum xxx

Day 23 - Today I am grateful for....Thoughtful Gestures

Today I am grateful for thoughtful gestures.

The kind that make even a small part of your day well....better.

A kind word, an encouragement, a smile, a hug, a pat on the back for a job well done, a commiseration, an acknowledgement of a feeling, a shared tear. All of these things and so many more can make another person's day better.

I walked in to work this morning to find this on my desk:

I'm not going to lie. I've had an awful couple of weeks. A divorce, a funeral, a breakup and a resignation in the space of two weeks has really got me wanting to jump into the bathtub with a toaster.

And in I walked to work this morning and my beautiful friend, Bianca had left me a little note and a little gift to make me feel better. Clearly she wasn't loving my bathtub/toaster idea....lol

To clarify and elaborate for you, the resignation I have mentioned, of course, was not mine. But the hole that the resignation has left in our office, has meant that I once again will step into the role of Maintenance Co-Ordinator until a replacement is found. I'm a horrible liar, so apart from the fact that I am vehemently against lying in any form, it is impossible for me not to follow my own moral code. Given my said inability to lie, it is therefore, fairly well known around my office that I don't love Maintenance. It's a tough job and one I did proudly for nearly 6 years, but by the end of it, I realised that I had ultimately burnt out. That's not to say I didn't enjoy parts of it, because I did and still do, but it's one of the most thankless positions in Real Estate. It is impossible to please everybody and no matter what you do, a Client or Tenant will ultimately be upset, frustrated, cross or angry. And really, to simplify, no one ever calls in to tell you you are fabulous or to thankyou for fixing their hot water system. They call to complain.

But at the end of the day, I love my job. I love the people I work with. I'm happy and content doing what I'm doing. I'm fiercely loyal and my employers have always been fabulous to me. I have been around so long, and have sat in almost every position there, so whenever they need me and wherever they need me, I happily do what they need me to. Without question and without complaint. In this instance obviously, it will be Maintenance. And I'm OK with that.

In fact, we've all been through so much together the last (nearly) 8 years, that they are as close to family as you can get. It's about teamwork and I'm happy to do whatever is necessary to return even half of the friendship, love and unwavering support they have afforded me over the years.

So when a colleague resigned yesterday without any notice, we have all needed to rally together. But my heart still sank a little bit, I've got to tell you. The lost training time and money from a business perspective, the lost new friend and work colleague from a personal perspective and the disappointment from a professional perspective.

But it was my little present this morning that really made my day improve from the start. I wasn't looking forward to today. I knew that it was going to be a horrible day. Why buck the trend, when the rest of the week has been so hideous?? And there it was. A little treat and an encouraging word, just for me. Just because she knew, even though her own work load is horrific, that I would have been sad and / or stressed and that she was thinking of me.

As I have mentioned in previous posts, I try to do something small each day, that makes someone elses day better. Sometimes my funds are limited but you know what? Smiles are free. Compliments are free. You can make someone's day better with the smallest act of kindness.

And Bianca is exactly the same as me. We've been friends for years. She is my boss but also one of my best friends. We share an office together and my current position sees me as a back up to her and another dear friend of mine, Karissa. So when something like this happens, and I'm taken away from being able to assist them as much as normal, it's so very thoughtful of her to even be thinking of me, when the whole situation makes her's and Karissa's life (and everyone else in our office) just as hard as it does mine.

Bianca, is very thoughtful and so sweet to me. We talk and laugh and share our deepest darkest secrets. We've had our ups and downs over the years, but ultimately we find our way and she's an amazing girl. She's also an amazing cook.

This week, I've actually been spoilt twice with thoughtful gestures. We happened to be on cooking roster together and she made extra so that I didn't have to cook! She also made one of my favourites....choc cheesecake slice.

Just to deviate for a moment, I cannot explain to you how delicious this slice is. And she made it....for me! Just because she knows how much I love it.

Even though she's my boss, or one of them, she always goes out of her way to thank me for random stuff that I do during the day for her....even though, frankly, she doesn't have to. She's my boss and it's my job!

But it's little things like today, that make me so thankful for her friendship.

In short, I always try to live my life in such a way that I can close my eyes at night and know that I've made a difference in someone's life today....just as she has mine. And it's encouraging for me to know that in my life, there are like minded people around me everywhere.

A thoughtful gesture. So very very grateful :-) Thankyou BK xxx

Day 22 - Today I am grateful for....The Australian Red Cross Blood Service

I gave plasma tonight at the Toowoomba Base, Red Cross Blood Service, with my friend Tiffany.

It's something that we do every couple of weeks and I'm proud to be a blood donor.

I'd been a blood donor years and years ago, but then I got a bit wild and got a few tattoos and started smoking and blood donation kind fell by the wayside. I was always an organ donor and I guess in hindsight, I thought that was enough. I'm not sure why, but I'm going to go with laziness on my behalf. I make no excuses.

However, given that RE/MAX is a part of the Corporate Challenge for blood donation, it seemed only fitting, as a long standing staff member that I do my bit for my community.

I've never known anyone who has ever needed a blood product. Fortunately, my nearest and dearest have all been blessed with full and healthy lives. Of course I realised the importance of it and was happy to do what I could to help someone else, but I'd never known or understood the true importance of it all.

When Tiffany came to work one day a couple of months ago and told me that her little cousin, Olivia had been diagnosed with Leukaemia at 4 months old, tears pooled in her eyes and my heart broke right along with hers. She was clearly devastated but I'd never seen anyone so calm and poised for action. Not unlike myself, she would lie down in front of a truck for her family, no matter the cost. And so began our mission with the Australian Red Cross Blood Service.

The first time (and every time now) we gave plasma together, we did it for Olivia and the nurses advised us that they would call the next day to check we were both OK. I took the call and I advised Tiff that my plasma was fine, but hers had glitter in it and was only to be used by special little girls in Brisbane...

I believe that every day you should do something to better the life of someone else. No matter if that is a smile, a kind word or a thoughtful gesture. I live by this motto and this was my way of making her feel a little bit better, for her and for her family. Unbeknowns to me, Tiff shared my glitter story with Olivia's Mum and the rest of her family and the wonderful Nurses and Doctors caring for Olivia in Brisbane. 

Tiff's blood is now known as "glitter blood" and whilst we are aware, that the likelihood of Olivia actually receiving Tiffany's blood is remote, it doesn't matter. It's the thought that counts and there is even a little bag of glitter at the end of Olivia's bed in Brisbane to mark the gesture of a beloved family member.

RE/MAX Success won the corporate challenge for blood donation this year. Because we are that awesome.


We were invited to attend a breakfast with other donors in the challenge and it was encouraging to hear stories from survivors whom had benefited from blood products and blood / plasma donation.

I'll always be a blood donor. Never again will I let my commitment take a back seat to my passion. I hope and pray that I and my family / friends will never need a blood product, but if we do, the Australian Red Cross Blood Service will be there and so will I. What a simple and remarkable way to make a difference in someone's life.

So today, I'm grateful for the awesome work that the Australian Red Cross Blood Service do every day, for every day Australians like you & I.

Day 21 - Today I am grateful for....Surprise Emails!

Today I am grateful for surprise emails received from treasured friends in far off lands!

I received a lovely email from my beloved friend, Ellen this morning. Now that she's living in London, we can't see each other every day and can't speak to each other every day. So email is our main point of contact and even then sometimes life gets in the way and sometimes weeks and months go by.

Ellen & I became friends when she worked at RE/MAX in 2007/2008. We clicked immediately and I was drawn to her amazing sense of humour. We laughed all the time and became close quickly.

Toward the end of 2009, she announced that she was off to explore the world and would be gone for at least 2 years. I was mortified. Was it not bad enough that she was living in Brisbane by then?? OMG.

We cried hysterically the night before she left but we knew each other well enough to know that we would never be far from each others hearts, no matter the distance between us.

A couple of months after she'd gone, my Husband left. I spent hundreds of dollars calling London and crying down the phone. She always made me feel better, even though she was on the other side of the world. She was the only one who called him on his poor behaviour to his face, and boy did she let him have it! She was as angry and hurt as I was.

When I bought my Ex-Husband out of our marital home during our separation settlement, I ensured that I borrowed enough money for me to go OS for a couple of weeks. It was a break that I badly needed. I needed out of Australia and fast.

Ellen planned the whole thing. I told her where I wanted to go and in May of this year, she met me at Heathrow and we had a whirlwind 3 week adventure around Ireland, Scotland, Paris and London.

My goodness! We just had the best time. We talked, we laughed, we cried. We caught up on an extremely emotional 7 months. We had fun and adventures and just enjoyed spending time together. We got lost, we met new people, we walked and talked and ate and drank....a lot. We had many hilarious "Where the f*ck are we Felicia?" moments, and I lost count of the times where my ribs hurt from laughing so much. When it came time for me to go, we really didn't even say goodbye, I just hopped on the tube and said "See you soon" and she was gone. Goodbye is too final and neither of us had sufficiently prepared ourselves for an emotional farewell.

We caught up again in September, when she was here for her Brother's wedding. And you'd swear that 4 hours hadn't passed, let alone 4 months. But that's just how our friendship is. No matter the time or the distance, we can pick up exactly where we left off.

And given the recent crap time in my life the past few weeks, it was such a treat to receive an email from my friend, whom I love dearly and miss terribly.

So today, I'm grateful to be in someone else's thoughts and for surprise emails. Love you girl xxx

Day 20 - Today I am grateful for....Herriot House Veterinary Surgery

Today I am so grateful to Herriot House Veterinary Surgery.

My poor little Lily hurt her leg last night. After making a mad dash out the front door, she came flying back in just as quickly but whimpering and limping.

Frantically, Kathy & I attempted to locate a prickle or bite in her little foot, without success. The poor little poppet wouldn't put any weight on her little leg and was out of sorts all night. She wouldn't settle and was obviously in pain.

This morning, she hadn't gotten any better and I fought internally with myself as to whether I would wait until tomorrow to take her to the vet. My conscience and love for my dog won. And I whizzed her off to see Peter Knoble at Herriot House during my lunch hour.

To put things into perspective, Herriot House and more importantly, Peter Knoble, has been our family vet for well over 15 years. I can't tell you how thankful I've been to them on many occasion. The vet nurses are always cheerful and all of the vets are amazing.

When my little cat Bundy was hit by a car and was killed, they sent the most amazing poem and it has stayed with me all of my life...it's called The Rainbow Bridge:

THE RAINBOW BRIDGE

  When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

Author unknown...

No matter how many times I read this poem, I'm always close to tears. It brings back many happy memories of lost pets over the years and renewed joy that one day I will see them again.

When Charlie got a stick stuck in his 3rd eyelid (yes, that's correct), it was them I called immediately and they fit me in on a public holiday.

When I found an injured echidna, it was them I called at 1am in the morning for advice.

All of my family pets have always gone to Herriot House, and apart from nearly owning shares in the place, the Armstrongs are well known :-)

Every animal I've ever treasured as a pet, or otherwise, I've taken them to see Herriot House. I wouldn't take them anywhere else.

George is very convinced that Herriot House is a wonderland that has been created specifically for him. No matter if he's going for a needle, puppy preschool or to be desexed, he's so excited and knows exactly where the car is going. He flirts with all the girls and I'm quite convinced it would be the only other place apart from here, that he would happily call home.

So when I took Lily in today, Peter advised me that likely Lily had dislocated or sprained her knee cap. (This wouldn't be so funny if I didn't have the same affliction in my own stupid knees - pretty sure it's not hereditary). And here I was thinking she might have been bitten by a spider or had a prickle in her foot! But oh no, can't be simple. Meanwhile, she may have also torn some muscles and ligaments and really should get some rest.

Well, good luck getting her to rest. She's the busiest dog I know and when she has a Brother like George, rest is not an option.

So we'll see how she goes over the next week but I'm just glad she's OK.

And I'm uber-grateful for my local vet. I cannot sing their praises highly enough :-)

Day 19 - Today I am grateful for....Days off

Today I'm grateful for days off.

I've just had 5 days off and until today, I hadn't realised just how much I needed them.

There is a lot to be said for days off. You can get so many things done, that you don't get time in a normal week to do. You can shop and clean and get some order into your life.

I wish I could say that I've achieved something but I really haven't. But it was a few days that I definately needed. Especially today.

I had big things planned. I wanted to spend time in my yard (fail) and clean my office (epic fail) and sadly I was able to do neither. The only thing I did achieve was cleaning my house and thank God I did that or my brain just wouldn't have coped.

When you are feeling sad, the last thing you want to do is go to work, so after yesterday, I'm thankful that I didn't have to go in today. At least I don't have to smile and pretend to be happy, when I'm not. I can sit on my bum on the couch and watch scary movies if I want to. Or I can cry. Or I can do nothing at all. And I'm not bothering anyone. It's great!

I haven't had a holiday since June. Arguably, it's only been 5 months yes, but a lot has happened in that time. And I'm feeling more than a little bit overwhelmed with life in general.

You could say that I'm burnt out. I know when I've reached this point. I'm either due for my Vitamin B shot or I'm burnt out. Lucky for me, at the moment it's both. So my Doctor sorted out my Vitamin B deficiency today and my days off have hopefully sorted out the rest. Hopefully....

I'm a little bit sad that my days off are drawing to a close and I have to go back to work tomorrow but I'm more than grateful for the few days I have had off. Looking forward to a few more next month. Bring on Christmas / New Year 2010 :-)

Day 18 - Today I am grateful for....Chapters in the book of my Life

Today I am grateful for Chapters in the book of my life.

I broke up with my man-friend today.

I cried.

I'm devastated.

Again.

Haven't I been here before?

But I am grateful for the time we spent together. It was lovely. He is an amazing man but I, unfortunately, am not the person he would choose to spend the rest of his life with. Apparently, I'm not that girl for anyone.

Another chapter in the book of my life that has come to an end.

It's a sad realisation to have come to, that I may actually be alone forever. I'm not being melodramatic. I'm not fishing for sympathy. It's honestly something that I probably need to start coming to terms with. It's not what I would choose for myself but it's looking more and more that way each day. No matter how positive I try to keep myself, and find something wonderful in every day, the chapters keep coming to a close in very similar ways. One would have to assume, that as I am the common denominator, that the fault effectively does lie somewhere with me. Perhaps there is a lesson somewhere in all of this for me?

In fairness, he never lied to me. He was never cruel to me. He never raised his voice at me or called me names. He was kind and gentle and non-assuming. A gentle, laid back soul whom I adored. But, we just weren't meant to be. I simply wasn't enough for him.

I feel the all too familiar ache in my heart. The feeling of worthlessness and hatred for myself. The feeling that I'm just not good enough for anyone. I won't let that feeling settle in my heart for too long though. And let's face it, the recovery time is much quicker these days and I'm sure in a couple of days I will be OK again.

That said, it's all a part of the book of my life isn't it? Each chapter in my book has it's own story. It's like a million stories in one book, and that book defines me. And each time I finish a chapter, I try to find a reason to look back on it fondly.

So today, I'm choosing to be grateful for this chapter and every chapter in the book I call my life. No matter how heartbreaking, they make me, well, me.

And tomorrow, I'm sure I'll be back to remembering how awesome I am because....After every dark night, there is always a much brighter day....

Day 17 - Today I am grateful for....Shopping with my Mum

Today I am grateful for time spent with my Mum.

I know I've said it before but my Mum is uber-special. And I just love spending time with her. I've been what you might call a bad daughter, the past few weeks so I've amped it up a little bit and had lunch with her already this week and a shopping date today! We talk every day on email or phone but it's not the same as catching up in person.

I love going shopping with my Mum. Hell, I just love spending time with my Mum. Not only is she a keen bargain hunter (wonder where I got it from?) but she's also very good at keeping me in check when I need to pull my head in.

There's this look, see. It's the Mum look. And no matter how old you get or where you are, it's there. You don't have to be being really naughty or rude or precocious, as you get older, it's more of a "seriously?" look. The kind that levels you and very quickly pulls you out of whatever delirium you currently find yourself in.

You: "Oh, I reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeealllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly need this <insert useless item here> and I'll just die if I don't have it"...take one look at Mum expecting approval and instead get the "Seriously? You really need that? What are you going to use it for? Where are you going to put it? Look how expensive it is! You don't need it. Stop being ridiculous" look. No words required. Enough said. I know everyone knows what I mean....

It's fun though. I always find stuff that I would never have found shopping on my own or with anyone else. I trust my Mum's judgement implicitly. I don't care what anyone else says, if my Mum says that something is poorly made or a bad investment, or alternatively something is definately a worthwhile buy, 9.5 times out of 10, I listen. And the .5 where I don't, I'm invariably wrong anyway! That trust obviously extends well past a shopping adventure too of course. In life and shopping, I only ever trust my Mum :-) But we always find a bargain or two when shoppping. And we always spend too much money. That's not to say we don't need what we have bought, and we never spend money we don't have, but I know I always feel naughty when I come home and see everything. I get the shopping guilts majorly. I soon get over it though....

But you know what else? It's time with just Mum & I. We potter around and look at stuff. Try stuff on. Ask each other's opinions. Would this look good in the lounge? Do you like this lamp? What about this doona cover for the spare room? It's always the same routine. We have coffee and lunch and talk and laugh. I love it! It's special time together. Of course I love my Dad, but it's nice to be able to have her all to myself sometimes. I'm a Mummy's girl through and through and bloody proud of it!

So today, I'm grateful for a shopping date with my Mummy :-) Love you Mum xxx

Day 16 - Today I am grateful for....Hot Showers

Today I am grateful for Hot Showers. A short one this morning :-)

Ahhhhhh......Hot Showers = Bliss. Enough said.

Waking up this morning, I remembered that today I am to attend my friend's funeral in Goondiwindi. I'm up early but have no real enthusiasm for the day....clearly.

My whole body is aching (per usual) and I'm wondering if I can actually drag myself out of bed?

I do and simultaneously jump into a lovely hot shower. Ahhhh....that's better.

When my muscles and body hurt in the morning, hot water usually helps to soothe any discomfort and stiffness. Got to love Fibromyalgia....

There's a lot to be said for hot showers. The soothing warmth on your skin. The feeling you get when your muscles unclench and start to calm. The lovely relaxing sound of the water running. The steam as it fills up the mirror and makes its way to the exhaust fan / window. The amazing clean feeling you get when you step out. Water restrictions aside, I believe that I would love to be able to stand under the water until I got pruny! Of course I don't, as I am aware we are in a drought but if I could (and my conscience let me), I certainly would....

Showers can be dangerous places too though, let's be honest. I actually gave myself concussion in Venice while holidaying there in 2009. I smashed my head on the marble half return of the shower wall and nearly knocked myself out. In hindsight, I laugh hysterically but at the time, it really hurt! Apparently you could have heard the bang from reception downstairs! A large bruise in the centre of my forehead, a sick feeling in my stomach and a massive headache later, I was stuck on the gondola's of Venice island.....a story for another time. But for those of you who know how much I hate water, the above story will make your sides hurt with laughter! Concussion and stuck on a boat....no no no.

Meanwhile for today's purposes, I ran the hot water out during said shower this morning....so thank God for gas HWS too! Or my little flatmate Kathy might be cross with me :-)

So I'm now feeling slightly more human again and I'm going to go and beautify and attempt to pretend I'm ready for this horrible day to begin.

Day 15 - Today I am grateful for....Rain

Today I am grateful for the rain!

Good old Toowoomba, Queensland, Australia, 4350. Four seasons in one day. But I'm not complaining. There is something very cathartic about writing when it's raining and overcast outside. 

Meanwhile, for those Toowoombarites who love the rain, please send a big 'thankyou' my way because the only reason it is raining, is because I washed my car. Yes, that's right. My little Mazda 3 is now officially known as the rain-maker. Because EVERY time, without fail, when I wash my car, within 2 days (sometimes 2 hours), it always rains. It could be clear as a bell outside, blue skies, birds chirping, but it always happens. Blah!

I do love this weather though. I love the smell of rain. I love the beading of the rain drops on green leaves. I love how bright all the colours in the world look even though the sky is ashy.

Today, I'm home alone, I've cleaned my house, had lunch with my beautiful friend Anita, then had a whirlwind de-hoarding session with another amazing friend, Ronnie. Rain is normally a time to slow down but not today!

Rainy days are perfect for cuddles, sleeping, curling up in bed with a book or perhaps watching a nice movie on the TV with popcorn. Although I've opted for cleaning, lunching, dehoarding and blogging, I'm still feeling relaxed :-)

George & Lily do not love the rain however. Whilst they love playing in the water and mud, they do not like being left outside. And I can't blame them but seriously, when they look like this.....

And our back yard looks like this.....

It's easy to understand, from my point of view why they cannot come inside and kind of easy to feel a little bit sorry for them at the same time.....

Poor little poppets....

I'm also grateful that this lovely rain (whilst inconvenient to the lifestyle of my animals), is helping out our farmers. It's making our trees grow, our grass green and our water tanks full. It's bringing back life to an unloved garden...read: mine. It's making puddles for children to play in and drive their parents crazy. It's softening hard unforgiving soil. It is keeping people in jobs - mower men, landscapers, farmers. It's filling dams and rivers. It is helping crops grow and helping us prepare for dry times.

I'm not going to lie, there was a time in my real estate career, way back in the day when I was a Maintenance Co-Ordinator, that I literally dreaded the sound of rain. Even a sprinkle of rain meant problems. Leaking roofs, gutters overflowing, ceilings leaking. It was awful stuff and there was literally nothing that could be done. All of the above said issues, require a tradesman to inspect and they won't go in the rain. There is no point. Nothing would dry to seal, but moreover, there is a greater risk of injury on a slippery roof or ladder. Unfortunately, Tenants rarely seemed to be able to comprehend this dilemma and often people became adgitated and angry when I couldn't solve a problem. I of course tried, but there can be a limit to my awesomeness...

Similarly, in my personal life, there are times when I dread the rain....and everyone's been here....you have clothes on the line, the windows in your house or car are open, you've just washed your car or you have curly hair and you've just straightened it....nightmare. But you suck it up and move on, because the positives far outweigh the negatives in my opinion.

So today, I'm grateful for the rain. Big fat rain or windy, misty rain. Either is OK with me today :-)

Day 14 - Today I am grateful for....Time Alone

 Today I am grateful for....Time Alone

There is something to be said for silence. Sometimes it is great to have a minute to yourself to take stock of what's important in life. You can get lost in your thoughts, plan for the day ahead, plan for the year ahead, hell you can plan the rest of your life if you want to, but it's time by yourself. You are not swayed by the opinion of anyone else or by a situation or circumstance. Call a spade a spade - silence is "you" time. Time to collect the thoughts in your brain and reassess. On the flip side, silence can be so loud it's deafening and lonely but frankly, you can't have one without the other. I've experienced both sides of that coin.

But as the months and years roll on and I get older, I've begun to appreciate time by myself so much more than I used to.

There was a time when I needed people around me all the time. I was literally incapable of being alone. My Mother would tell you it was because I didn't have a play pen as a child, so I never learnt to amuse myself. I would say it was because I love people. And I do, but she's still half right. I didn't like my own company (sometimes I still don't). I needed other people to validate my existence. Surely, if I was spending time with someone, then I must be OK? Rubbish. I'm fine. They spend time with me because I'm amazing of course, but I'm just as amazing on my own....

During my marriage, there were constantly people at my house. We were forever having dinners and parties. There were always people everywhere. I wish I'd known how much it had infuriated my Ex-Husband but I didn't until it was to late. In retrospect, I probably insisted on having people around because we really didn't have that much in common. Not his fault. Not mine. Our intellect was on different levels and we were not interested in the same things. One would say these insights might have been helpful before getting married, but cest le vie! What's done is done.

When he left, I had to learn to be by myself. And I did. I spent months by myself. I did things occasionally with people when I was forced to (by way of utterly deserved kick up bum by friends) but no one really darkened my doorstop for a long time. Apart from the fact that I was miserable to be around, I needed to recouperate and rest. I possibly would have stayed that way if it weren't for my Mother who told me I looked and behaved like a dead person. And she was right. I was. A part of me had died and I didn't want to exist in a world without my Husband in it. It took a long time to realise he wasn't coming back and I had some living to do. In whatever capacity I could manage it. The pain was there but the world continued to keep spinning and the sun continued to come up each day, often much to my dismay.

But now, after going through what I've been through, I truly value time alone. I've done so much soul searching in the last year that you'd think I'd have to be sick of myself soon, but I'm not. I genuinely enjoy my own company now and in fairness, I'm rarely alone really as my kids are never far away. I'm more than happy to plonk myself in front of the couch and watch TV in my PJ's. Who cares? I don't. I'll play on the computer or rest or read a book. Time alone is good for the soul.

That's not to say that I don't love people anymore, because I certainly do but I'm such a chatterbox that sometimes I wear myself out! But I'm with people all day, every day, so sometimes, it's nice to just be by myself. Just me. It's also nice to have come to the realisation as an adult that the world will still keep turning, no matter where I am or who I'm with.

So today, I'm grateful for time alone and me time. A place I never thought I'd actually be!

Day 13 - Today I am grateful for....My Home

Today I am grateful for....My Home

Home is where the heart is. I wholeheartedly believe that.

My Ex-Husband & I moved into our home a week before we were married. We lived happily here until, well, we didn't. During our separation, I bought him out and completely renovated. I had the house repainted and I refurbished it. I renovated the kitchen and the bathroom and repainted inside and out. I completely changed the house until there was nothing of him left here. I needed to do it. For me.

I love my home and I was unwilling to part with it if I didn't have to. As luck would have it, I didn't have to.

Although today, I'm not entirely proud of my housekeeping skills (my house is a complete bomb shelter), I'm still proud of my home. I like having a tidy and clean home and I try hard to keep it that way. My home is a direct reflection of me. I worked hard to get it and I work damn hard to keep it. I own everything in it and it defines me. It's entirely me. My taste. My style. And I love it.

The kids and I live here very comfortably in the ghetto and we are very happy. My neighbours are quiet and I have both God & Buddha on my side here. My entire street is owned by Pure Land Learning, and the Chinese Buddist Monks are really easy to be around. They are happy and friendly and smile and wave whenever they see me. There are no loud parties, no violence, no problems.

Although I technically live in the ghetto, my lifestyle certainly does not reflect it. When I say God is here too, not only is he in my home, but Pure Land Learning is located in the old St Andrew's church, where my parent's were married and I attended church. It's a really special location for me personally but it's also very conveniently located to town, shops and the bottle-o....ha ha. The police have a station around the corner and I feel completely safe.

My home is always open and friends are constantly visiting. I love cooking and having people over. Many a fun party has been had in my home. There was a time where there was not a lot of life in my home, after my Ex-Husband left and it took my Mother telling me that my home reminded her of a morgue for me to wake up and realise that I needed to inject some life back into it. I needed to turn some lights on and even some music. Perhaps I could even turn on the TV....It took a little while but I got there and my home, while not as busy as it once was, is still my pride and joy.

To this day, I leave my back light and kitchen light on, so that my home is a beacon of safety for me when I come home at night. And there is always my little trio of wagging tails and happy faces to greet me.

My Home is definately where my heart is and today, like all days, I'm enormously grateful for it.

Day 12 - Today I am grateful for....The end of an era

Today I am grateful for....The end of an era

I filed for divorce today.

I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. I'm torn between the elation of a new beginning, and the torture of a lost love.

4 years of my life. Gone. A chapter in the book of my life....slammed shut.

Today marks the end of an era. I choose for my sadness to be fleeting. Lord knows the recovery time for me these days is much quicker....

I look back on my marriage with happiness and gratitude. I am grateful that I met my (now) Ex-Husband. I am grateful that I married him. I am grateful for the time we shared together. We shared a lot of love and a lot of happiness. By comparison, our married life was short compared to a lot of other unfortunate people in my position, but it doesn't lessen the pain. However, I choose to remember the man I married, not the man that broke my heart and left. The man I married, was gregarious, charming, thoughtful, kind, gentle and loving. And that is how I choose to remember him and our time together.

Our marriage didn't work. For whatever reason, we were not suited in life. I'm not so vain as to believe that I am the only one in the history of the world who this has happened to. But in my world, it was a terrible loss for me. And I feel a grief that will potentially settle in my heart for my lifetime. It will not define me though. I will not let pain and bitterness eat at me until I am but a shell of my former self. What is the point in dwelling on the past? What is the point in wallowing in my own self pity? What is the point in hoping for a miracle that will never come? There is none. What is done, is done and cannot be undone.

So I choose to close this chapter in my life, my way. It will not be slammed shut for me. I am closing it myself. I choose to look back at the end of an era without bitterness in my heart. I choose to forgive the pain and betrayal. I choose to remember the good times. I choose to believe that this is not the last man on earth that I will love. I choose to believe that I deserve to be happy again. I choose to believe that I am worth loving. I choose to believe, that one day, I will be more than enough for someone. I choose to move forward with my life. Always forward, never backwards.

To the end of an era....looking foward to a whole new one!

Day 11 - Today I am grateful for....Sleep

Today I am grateful for....Sleep

Words cannot express how grateful I will be to snuggle up into my bed tonight and get some sleep.
 

I'm not a person who suffers from insomnia, however, due to another illness that I suffer, I miss out on the restorative sleep that most other people experience. I envy the people who wake up every day feeling refreshed. Lucky you! Suffice to say, most days I wake up feeling worse than when I went I went to sleep but....I do sleep. And I sleep as much as humanly possible.

It is well renowned that I could sleep on a rosebush if I was tired enough. I can and have fallen asleep in a very loud and very busy nightclub. This may or may not have been more acceptable had I been inebriated. I was however, stone cold sober (as per usual), very tired and...it was a really good sleep. I can sleep anywhere and if I'm tired enough, I do. Hospital floors, a Yankees game in Yankee Stadium in NYC, the side of the road, septic tanks, in the back of my little hyundai, under tables in restaurants, nightclubs, in a swag, in a chair....in fact just about anywhere.

Obviously when my Ex-Husband left, there were many sleepless nights, to which very thankfully, the medical profession intervened and supplied me sleeping tablets. I relied heavily on them for several months. If I managed to get to sleep, the nightmares were hideous and I invariably woke up thinking. My brain kept attacking me for the many reasons that my marriage went wrong. Thankfully, the tablets worked, and as time passed, I was able to slow my brain down, wean myself off all medication and my sleeping patterns returned to normal. I dream very rarely now unless I'm really tired and I very rarely wake up thinking. All part of the healing process I guess.

More recently though, in the past couple of months, my body has again begun to tell me that I'm weary and probably should be resting a little bit more than I do. But somehow, my mind twists everything and I keep thinking that the world will go into lockdown if I'm not there. My rational brain tells me this isn't true of course, but my irrational brain always tells me that someone needs me, I've made a commitment to be somewhere, I need to be out of the house, or God forbid...I might miss out on something.

As an adult, I should know better but old habits die hard I guess. So I thoroughly look forward to whatever sleep I can cram into my day.

After pretending last night that I wasn't 30 and didn't have to work today, I partied with all the cool kids until after midnight. (And yes, I am aware of how utterly lame that sounds, but believe me when I tell you that's a late night for me). When my brain kicked in, it reminded me that I had to work and don't cope without sleep, I went home. Which would have been fine if my very-drunk-man-friend (I'm too old for a boyfriend) wasn't up for a chit chat until 2am. Bloody men! Honestly.

So my proposed 8 hours sleep turned into 5 and now I'm ready to collapse with exhaustion. My whole body hurts and I have a headache. I'm pretty glad that I avoided the alcohol to go with my late night or the accompanying hangover to go with said lack-of-sleep may have actually killed me! The only saving grace for working all day today, was the company, a quick catch up with some girlfriends after work and having dinner cooked for me by above said chatty man-friend.....oh and the fact that I'm going to sleep very very soon.

So today, I'm prempting my grateful to something that is coming. Sleep. Very very soon :-)

Day 10 - Today I am grateful for....Birthdays!

Today I am grateful for....Birthdays!

Birthdays....Balloons, Cake, Candles. It's always the same. Laughter, fun and presents. Surrounded by people you love and whom love you. A day where YOU are celebrated for being you!


However, attention must be paid for the one's who got us here. Our Mums. There's something to be said for the Mother's that go through the pain. The one's who made us from scratch and got us here in one piece. Every year is the same for me. I may or may not have taken 36 hours to get here and my Mother may or may not jokingly forget when my actual Birthday is each year (It's the 5th of March, but she always thinks it's the 3rd), but it's totally fine. I got here in the end. But every year she always reminds me of the pain she went through...."You don't know the pain I went through....!" hmmm. No, she's right. I don't. But I'm close because she reminds me each year, God love her :-)

I've never been big on Birthdays, my own at least. It kind of comes and goes and never fails to remind me that I've achieved nothing in the 12 months prior, oh and that I'm a year older than I was last time. But other people's Birthday are a whole other story...

Today marks the day of birth for 3 of my lovely friends, Bradley, Tiffany & Megan.

Bradley and I have been friends for around 7 years or more now. We've been through everything together - laughed, cried and enjoyed a very special friendship. Even when I was married, Bradley & I always shared Date night on a Wednesday. This used to constitute watching McLeod's Daughters or Grey's Anatomy. Well, he would sleep on my floor while I lay on my bed watching said shows. We did everything together. An extension of each other. Best Friends. People used to frequently assume that we were in a relationship. Boyfriends didn't believe me that we had never and to this day, have never been anything more than just friends. But they were told from the get-go that he was a part of my life and Hell would freeze over before I ever let him go. He ended up being Best Man at my wedding, not only because he was my friend, but also because he would have looked terrible in a dress. He is an amazing man and I love that we are like peas and carrots. So different, yet so the same. Bradley has recently (2 years ago - ha ha) found the woman of his dreams, Megan and plans to marry her in October 2011, and I'm thrilled. There are too many fabulous reasons why I love Bradley and treasure his friendship. And today....he turns 30. An epic Birthday!

Miss Tiffany also has an epic Birthday to mark today, and that is of the 21 variety. The big 2-1. My goodness, that seems like such a long time ago for me. By comparison, Tiff and I have been friends for a very short time but what a fabulous time we've shared. Tiff works in the RE/MAX Wonderland with me and has injected fun and enthusiasm into our office. Her positive attitude and "awesomeness" is unsurpassed. Each day she takes the time out to send an email with a positive thought for the day to pep us all up. We laugh all the time, at work and outside of work. We share secrets, laugh and cry together. She has a brilliant sense of humour and the ability to laugh at herself. She is my little blonde pocket rocket and I love her to bits.

Megan is turning a secret number today. For me at least, any number over 30 is a secret. I believe I shall be 30 forever. Megan is my boss, well one of them. Together with her Sisters, Bianca & Katie, and their Mum & Dad, Lynelle & Ian, they are RE/MAX Success. Megan is the fabulous Office Manager of the RE/MAX Wonderland. She has seen me (and almost everyone else in my office) through every crisis known to man....on a daily basis. She is patient, kind and funny. Oh and a super-Mum to Leroy & Lincoln. As a long standing staff member, her door is always open for me and all of my silly concerns in life. She's sat with me when I cry, and laughs at me when I'm silly. Inside and out of work, she's a star!

So Happy Birthday Friends! Today I'm grateful for you and I hope you are all having a fabulous day!

Day 9 - Today I am grateful for....Happy News on a Sad Day

Today I am grateful for....Happy News on a Sad Day

I received a message this morning with news of the tragic passing of a friend of mine, and I think my heart stopped momentarily. Surely not? There must be some kind of mistake? He was so young! Their family has been through so much already. I literally couldn't think of a useful thing to say. My whole heart hurt, not only for the loss of a friend but for his family and other people who knew and loved him.

And I couldn't help but wonder, what possible lesson could there be in this horrific loss? I don't understand God sometimes. Why do such terrible things happen to good people? It literally makes no sense to me. I prayed for his family and (most selfishly) for my day to pass quickly as my concentration went out the window.



I'm not great with death. I'm not afraid of dying but I don't want to die. There have been times in my life, many years ago, where that has not always been the case. And I'm then humbled and ashamed by that fleeting thought all those years ago, and I wonder how I could ever have been so collosally selfish to think that someone wouldn't miss me? And just like today, a wonderful young man has been cruelly taken away from his family and friends, who will miss him terribly. Where is the justice? Life just isn't fair sometimes.

Moments later, after receiving such heartbreaking news, I received some wonderfully happy news. News that was 10 years in the making. One of my oldest and best friends, Vicki, had become engaged! My heart was instantly filled with immense joy. I'm so very excited for her. And so begins the planning stages of an event to be filled with love and happiness.

Vicki & Nathan are the couple in a relationship that one aspires to be in, in life. Happy, successful and content. So comfortable around each other that they are simply an extension of each other. In 10 years there has been every high and every low imaginable and they have conquered the big stuff together. The uber-perfect couple. I'm in awe of the way they love each other and make each other happy every day.

There were so many emotions flowing around me today, it was very bittersweet. I'm not confident that my heart can fit the two in? So I'm choosing, for today at least, to let the happy fill my heart, instead of the sad.

So for today, I am grateful for happy news on a sad day.

Day 8 - Today I am grateful for....Dinner with the Elks'

Today I am grateful for....Dinner with the Elks'

My dear friend Andrea Elks & I try to catch up at least once per week for dinner with her family and I. Sometimes it's at my house, sometimes it's at hers. Wherever we are, there is warmth and love and laughter.

Andrea & I are kindred spirits and she is a shining light in my life. We've been close for around a year now and I just can't imagine my life without her in it. She helped me (along with many other people whom I will personally mention as my blog comes along) get through the past year. Her positive attitude is inspiring and I treasure her friendship every day. She is my "Tree Hugging Hippy" (by her own admission) and she is an amazing woman. We laugh all the time and share a love for animals.

I could go on for hours about how fabulous she is but I'll save that for another blog. For now, it's the dinners and special times that I'm focused on :-)

Our favourite times together are our dinners. Amongst other things, including wildlife carer, harley-davidson bike rider, barista and environmentalist, Andrea is also an amazing cook. I, on the other hand, am a very basic cook.....

I love visiting her & her Husband, Paul's home in God's Country...aka Murphy's Creek. I've adopted Andrea, Paul, Joey & Kathy as an extension of my family...whether they like it or not.


Miss Kathy now lives with me, so in effect I get a little piece of Andrea with me every day. It's a treat to have some life in my home again.

Tonight, we again shared another happy "family" dinner, at my house. The minutes slip by and before we now it, 3 hours go by and we've no idea where it went. Good times, spent with people who treasure each other's friendship. What better way to spend a Thursday night??

So today, and always, I am grateful for....dinner with the Elks' :-)

Day 7 - Today I am grateful for....The End of the Day

Today I am grateful for....The End of the Day.

I work in Property Management with RE/MAX Success in Toowoomba. I'm not going to lie, I work bloody hard. I'm proud of what I do. I'm proud of what all of us do. Whilst my job may not be physically demanding, it is most definately (some days) mentally demanding.

I've worked in the same industry for nearly 8 years now and it's one that you either love or you hate. There is no middle man. I've seen hundreds of people come and go in our office alone, over the years. Our work is hard.

I refer to the term "our" because my job is a very large part of my life and who I am. My colleagues are like family. We've been through so much together. The good, the bad, the ugly. The tears, the heartache, the triumphs. Family.

In Real Estate, there are some days where it would appear that it is completely impossible to please anyone. There are of course those wonderful days where everyone is happy and we've achieved some real success, but other days (like today) I feel like I'm chasing my tail. I've worked my bum off but I've achieved nothing. Bugger.

I'm really glad to see the arse end of today. It was most definately not the worst day in existence, in fact there were a lot of good things today, but nonetheless, here we are, 5:30pm is here and I feel good about that.


I've never been one to clock watch though. Nothing in the world annoys me more. It's not like the clock hits 5:31pm and I'm out the door. But I do relax a little bit. I don't think there has been a day in my work history even, that I've ever left work on time. I just can't do it. There are just some days though, when the daylight working hours drag their sorry arses along the ground and the day just never seems to end. It always does, it just sometimes takes a little bit longer :-)

Anyone who says they love their job, every minute of every day, is a liar. Unless your job is to sit on a banana lounge and sip on cocktails all day, then maybe I'd believe you but even then I think I'd be bored after awhile.

But, it's the end of the day. I can hang up my work troubles on the hook outside my back door and I shall pick up those troubles on the way back to work tomorrow. They'll still be there. It's the end of the day and I choose to enjoy the 12hrs until I'm on my way back.

But sometimes, like today, I'm so glad to see the end of the day. Hello 5:30pm - are you here already? It's lovely to see you :-)