Day 29 - Today I am grateful for....A Life Plan

I've been thinking a lot about my life lately.

I guess this project has been not only challenging but life affirming for me. It has been cathartic and healing. But it has also got me thinking about where I want to be in life. What do I want to do? Who do I want to be? Will I ever know?

I can't help but wonder what God has in store for me.

Life hasn't been fantastic recently, let's be honest.

And if I'm really honest, that's largely because of me. I haven't been in the right place mentally, emotionally, physically or financially.

That said, in my fantasy world I know exactly what I want in life.

I want a husband, children and a happy home. I want to be loved and cherished. I want to be content and financially secure. I want to be valued and comfortable in life.

What I want and what I deserve are potentially two different things.

I had most of the above, minus the children part and now, well, I don't.

So I guess it's a matter of choosing an alternative life plan. Making goals and achieving them.

I've never been a goal maker. Largely because I'm hopeless at it. I set myself goals and then I disappoint myself because I don't reach them. I then feel worse than before I made the goal.

But I think I need to look at my life a little bit differently. I choose to believe that God has wonderful things in store for me. I'd like to know when but apparently I'm not privy to that information.

So I'm going to set myself intermediate goals.

I would like to finish my Interior Design Course. I would like to then buy a camera and take a photography course. I would like to get fit and healthy. I would like to tend to my garden and get my life in order. I would like to learn to enjoy my own company. I would like to save some money and get out of debt. I would like to finish my blog and publish it.

So I'm going to.

For now, I'm going to alter my life plan. I'm going to alter what I'd always dreamed of because currently, it's just not an option.

I'm going to enjoy myself and stop wallowing. I'm going to stop wishing and start living. It's time.

So today, I'm grateful for my decision to make a new life plan. Because at the end of the day, it's my life. And I'm the only one who can make it amazing....